white water and my own personal B.

ok, so i've been meaning to post this for days now, but i've been a bit busy with all the craziness of life with my 3. i swear, they're part monkey! anyway, as austin chews on a cord at my feet, i'll attempt to tell this story. (don't worry, it's not connected to anything!)

last friday we decided to attempt white water, our local water park, with our dear friends dixie and jennifer. after 90 minutes of getting ready at home and driving to the park on the other side of town, i was already questioning my judgement to attempt this. and by the time we arrive, i'm already mentally exhausted. we arrived at the same time as dixie, and after unloading in the hot sun for 15 minutes (thank you dixie, for sunscreening my kids), we made the 104 mile hike across the parking lot to the entrance.

(pause...austin just spit up on the cord, ok, all cleaned up now. i swear he has spit up 19 times today! sorry i'm swearing so much, but remembering this story brought it out in me!)

ok, so there we are at the entrance, hot, sweaty, and tired. dixie and i and our cumulative 5 children (and the gigantic double stroller loaded to the brim with all the necessary stuff it takes to go to white water with my 3 kids) are about to enter through the first gates when Mr. Bill stops us for a "bag check."

ok, side note. for the last 3 or 4 years white water has been "tightening" their rules as to what type of food you can bring in their park. we all know they are doing this because they want you to buy their food. at first you couldn't bring "food" but you could bring snacks for the little ones. then last year they decided no snacks either. so this year i went, knowing that i couldn't have any food with me. all i had was one small soft side cooler with 2 sippy cups, 2 juice boxes, and 1 bottle of baby formula. last year, that was perfectly acceptable. so as we approach Mr. Bill (or as i now refer to him as my own personal "B".), he spies my cooler, and very loudly informs me "NO COOLERS ARE ALLOWED ON PARK." i, very firmly replied "It only has DRINKS in it." now, i'm already on edge, what with the 2 hours that it has taken me to get to this point, and i'm in NO MOOD for Mr. Bill's crap, pardon me. Mr. Bill doesn't realize that i'm no pushover yet, and says "NO COOLERS AT ALL." again i say "It ONLY HAS DRINKS." only this time i match his tone. Mr. Bill, not realizing the force that one very tired and cranky, not to mention, sleep deprived mom can be, says "The park now has a no cooler policy, EVEN FOR DRINKS." "But my BABIES milk that HAS TO STAY COLD is in here" i say. Mr. Bill says "Sorry, NO COOLERS ALLOWED." ok, so now i am TICKED! No one tells me that i can't bring in sustenance for my baby, and i mean NO ONE. i am usually a very easy going person, but sometimes i get that "listen hear mister" voice and i can get pretty mad. and this day, i was mad. so i say "You can't tell me i can't bring in my BABIES bottle." and he says "Oh, you can bring it in, just not in the COOLER." "What?" i say. he informs me that i can put everything, including the ice pack that is in the cooler, in my beach bag and bring it in that way. "Um, ok, but if it's not in the cooler, IT WON'T STAY COLD." i say. now, this is what REALLY got me, he says "THAT'S NOT MY PROBLEM." What!!!! OHHH buddy, it's about to be your problem. After a few more exchanges between Mr. Bill and I about the fact that once you take the stuff out of the cooler, it won't stay cold, and about it not being his problem, i'd had enough. i asked to speak to someone else and he motioned towards guest relations, just behind him. as i started to go to guest relations, he had the nerve to STOP me and MAKE me take everything out of my cooler. I did, and then i started for guest relations. "EXCUSE ME!" he yelled at me, "YOU CANNOT TAKE THE COOLER PAST THIS POINT." i had inadvertently forgotten that the now empty cooler was still hanging off my arm. "You have to leave it in your car." "WHAT!", I yell back, "I am NOT hiking ALL THE WAY back to my car with ALL 3 of my LITTLE kids to take an EMPTY cooler BACK TO MY CAR! he backed off slightly at that point and motioned to a place i could set the cooler, off to the side. I sat the cooler down and went straight to guest relations. there i informed a women of what Mr. Bill had just put me through. she said "Oh, he can't tell you that you can't take your babies formula IN THE COOLER in. You can, we just have to escort you and the cooler to first aid and you have to leave it there until you need it. and then you can get the formula, but the cooler has to stay there while your on park." I informed her about how ridiculous that was, but conceded because i felt i had no other option. at least she didn't yell at me. she told me that "most people choose to just leave their coolers in their cars. and go get drinks as they need them." i told her how that was just not feasible for me and my 3 kids ages 5 and under. she said she understood, but that they had to make that "cooler rule" because if other people saw my cooler they might think it had food in it and then they would be mad that they couldn't bring in their cooler.

Now, tell me something. If they check everyone's coolers at the gate WHICH THEY DO, then obviously if someone has a cooler in the park, it wouldn't have anything in it that it's not supposed to have! Right? So that explanation is completely illogical! the guest relations lady spoke to Mr. Bill and informed him of the "first aid option." But as far as i know, that's as far as my complaint got. However, I'm going to be informing White Water, as well as a couple of newspapers and television stations, about my experience. we spend hundreds of dollars every year to have season passes to all the Silver Dollar City parks, we should be treated WAY better than that.

Our day ended quickly since after one hour of water filled fun, it began to storm. Yep, after all that, we got rained out!