Tuesday, October 30, 2007

Drama Queen

My friend Dawn, just wrote about a challenge she's having with her Boys, and the dreaded "potty talk." While I sympathize with her, I realize that even though this issue is something we have dealt with some, as the mother of 2 girls (the boy can't say much yet!), I'm sure I have no idea of the levels of which she deals with it. It's interesting, the differences between boys and girls at such young ages. I could tell immediately that having Austin was waaaay different than having the girls! And while I feel for Dawn, (and myself in the future!), I have to say, I'd trade some potty talk for all the Drama that comes with a 5 year old girl!

Tonight Ellie had dance practice. We bought some new $50 dance shoes, and tonight was the first night to wear them. As we put them on, the Drama started. First, I didn't tie them right. Then, I didn't pull the tongue up enough. Then, I got frustrated at her pickiness, and yelled at her, and she got mad at me. She proceeded into the bathroom, where she locked herself in and her only means of communication was yelling and screaming through the door. "I hate you", and "Just Shut-up", were among some of the screams. Seriously, she's a 13 year old wrapped up in a 5 year old's body! I was just about at my wits end, and totally embarrassed, when a few mom's in the hearing vicinity, started telling me some words of encouragement. These were women who I either barely know, or don't know at all. But they encouraged me, and that meant so much. They didn't judge, or look away, they helped.

I was reminded to try, anytime I see a mom in turmoil, to help. To let them know that it happens to us all. To be Real, as Pam reminded us.

The Drama went on for about 5 minutes, followed by 5 minutes of the "Silent" treatment. I almost went and asked for a key, but something held me back. I sensed that she needed some space to calm herself down. Then she came out, perfectly fine. Honestly, you couldn't tell by her face that anything had even happened! She went into dance class, and at the end, the parents were invited in to see a dance they'd been working on. She smiled as she danced for us, and afterwards was as sweet as Pecan Pie.

This first Girl of mine is a challenge sometimes. I'm learning so much by parenting her. Many times I feel so inadequate, but I have to remember that God is more than adequate! He made her, personality and all! Drama and all!


Carissa said...

so cool that you just KNEW to wait her out. i think that is your "mom six sense" kicking in. well, that and the holy spirit. anyway, good for you. to recognize that even a 5 year old needs some emotional space. that is neat shelley!

Janelle said...

You are the perfect mom for Ellie. God knew what He was doing when He gave her to you. It was His choice to blend your personalities together. He trusts you with her and you are the perfect choice.

Honestly, I don't really know what I would have done in that situation. It is so hard to know when to step in and save and when to let go and wait. Sounds like you did the right thing.

Good job! You are one amart mama!

Alana said...

Sounds a lot like my 13 year old self. Actually, it sounds a little like my 32 self sometimes, too. I'm glad there were Moms there to help and encourage you.

Erin said...

Thanks for the sweet comment on my blog! You're right, that is so crazy!! I'm just as amazed as you are. Isn't the internet fun.

And have fun with all that drama. I wonder if I did that to my mom. :)

dawn said...


I applaud you. Actually, I standing ovation you. There is a purpose for these moments in life and we can only pray that God uses them for his glory one day. And he will.

Pam said...

Shelley~ I'm so proud of you for allowing the other moms the blessing of helping you. It can be an uncomfortable situation all the way around when our kids choose to act that way. So many times we can get caught up in how it reflects on us that we forget they are the ones choosing this behavior and therefore we are not able to stand back and deal with it calmly ourselves. So, I too applaud you and agree that you are the perfect mom for Ellie.

Faith said...

oh wow! you weren't kidding....this DOES sound incredibly familiar!!! I'm definitely going to be adding your blog to my regular reads!! *GRIN* can't offer words of wisdom, but I sure can offer empathy!!! haha!