I should spend my summer wearing a black and white shirt.

I live my life in a state of confusion. I thought I went to college to study art. But no, apparently it was to become a referee. 

Sigh.

Siblings are an enigma to me.

Actually, traditional family dynamics are a bit of an enigma to me. 

I am an only child. I was a happy only child. I rarely wanted for anything. For 6 years I was the only child of a single mom. I was the apple of my mother's eye. My grandparents adored me. My mom taught me everything at a young age. I could answer the phone, sound very mature, and take messages when I was 8. I was cooking simple meals at 9. I cleaned her make-up mirrors for her before she left to do a Mary Kay class, Sure, I always thought it would be cool to have a little sister or brother, but overall, I led a pretty awesome life.

Fast forward to my life now. At some point I decided I loved little kids and had 3 of my own. Now I wonder...What was I thinking??

They fight ALL THE TIME. Or they're best friends. Who knows on any given day. I wish they had a meter on their heads to let me know what kind of mood they were in.  Green would be, I love my brother today! Yellow, I'm a little cranky and need some space, and Red would be, You might as well lock me in my room right now, 'cause I'm gonna make your life h#$$ today.

Wouldn't that be cool?

Instead, I'm on my own. No one in my extended family had 3 children close in age. No one has any helpful advice. Every morning I'm trying to gauge what the day will hold. Obviously Ellie's Asperger's changes things, but still, I'm basically trying to figure out who's-gonna-mess-with-who-today-and-how-long-til-I-need-excedrin-migraine? Every single day.

I love them. Really. But holy crap they wear me out! I mean really? We need to fight over how loud someone is breathing? Or how someone scrapes their teeth on the fork too loud? Or what size the water balloons need to be?


I used to think I would be the mom who helped her little darlings make a craft everyday. Instead, I'm the mom who throws craft supplies on the table and then backs away quickly as the fighting frenzy ensues over who gets what. Just praying that in the end no one does any permanent damage to anyone else.

Today is the last day of summer school.

2 months and 2 days until the next school year starts.

Not that I'm counting...