For my friends and family who read this blog, and don't have children, let me just say this...I didn't go into mommyhood ready to deal with the bodily fluids. Just like I didn't go into mommyhood ready to deal with the lack of sleep. I mean, BK (before kids) the thought of dirty diapers and throw-ups freaked me out. I figured they would happen. I'd heard the stories from my own mother. Still, it's just not something that you really want to dwell on, and so you don't. I've heard friends and family say things like...I just don't think I could handle that...What?! Like I did?!
I mean, that would just be wrong!
So like I said, I have stories, OH do I have stories. One in particular comes to mind, but I think I'll wait to share that one next time. Instead I'll tell you about this morning...
I went in to get Austin out of bed. At that moment everything was normal. His diaper was squishy, but not leaking out, so I thought I'd change him in a few minutes, probably after breakfast.
Remember, he's the third.
So I put him down to play and I went to make a healthy and nutritious breakfast of toaster waffles.
Don't judge, remember, I have three.
As they popped up, I went to find Austin and proceeded to try and buckle him into his booster chair.
That's when I smelled him.
Nice.
I went to change him. Normal procedure, lay him down, lay him down again, FORCE him to lay down...I finally got him still by singing Itsy Bitsy Spider. So here I am, singing...
The Itsy Bitsy Spider, climbed up the water spout...unzip pj's...Down came the rain and...where's the diaper?...washed the spider out...what's that big lump down by his foot under his pj's?...out came the sun and dried...OH that's the diaper...up all the rain...UH OH...and the itsy bitsy spider climbed up the spout again.
Did you catch that? The diaper was wrapped around his ankle. And the um...stuff I smelled? Yeah, apparently he did that after the diaper had slid down.
What a nice way to start the morning.
12 comments:
Oh, my shelley...You are gonna get so many jewels in your crown for your motherhood!
That's hilarious!! I have so many pictures that I don't post because Luke's diaper is hanging to his knees .
No joke- I tried to teach Elle how to change him. HAHAHA, the plan was to give her a quarter each time!
wow...i hate to say this...but my first reaction was "gross"!!! : )
Awesome! You are the woman!
Ah yes...the true joys of motherhood! Just when you think you've seen it all!
What a lovely way to start the day. Almost as good as getting rid of two dead mice in your garage.
oh my...what have i gotten myself into!
I kinda gagged a little on that one....thanks for not sharing the "clean up" part! :)
We've all been there.
I'm always game for a good diaper story! Excellent!
SICK OUT!!!!!!
But way to go Austin..give yo momma a run fo her money!
Shelley - seriously - you make me laugh out loud almost every time. really. around the ankle? no judgement from anyone.
that is why i am not going to have three - ankle diapers and rides in the stroller basket. =)
Hilarious!!
I haven't even 'met' you, and I already think I love you. You're so sweet, and your stories always make me smile, if not laugh out loud.
Yeah...you definitely earned some jewels in your mothering crown for that one!
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